Friday, October 29, 2010

Turning Off the Dollar Signs

In preparation for a possible change, I've uploaded a version of my resume explaining why I'm currently living in one part of the country, but searching for a job in a different industry in another geographic location.  I haven't really done anything with it yet.  It's just hanging out there, either waiting to be deleted if I get a stop sign or used if I get a green light.  A potential green light that can't happen until my last recommendation gets sent by a very busy lady and GRE test round #2 gets taken to improve my math score.  Of course I realize this action is really fruitless since an MFA program could care less about this section and it's only for one school.  But when I think I want something, I get competitive and it's for the one with the pretty, romantic looking scenery.  Hey, I admit, I can get a little "Cher Horowitz" sometimes.

So anyway, sometimes I get these recruiters who e-mail or call me with their b.s. speals about how they think I'm the "perfect candidate" for their open position.  The ones from third-party job recruiting companies are the most annoying since the only way they get paid is if the company who's secured their services ends up hiring the candidate they found.  Yes, I realize I'm a newly minted MBA and have worked for five years with the number one sales organization in the USA.  I know, on paper I look like the "perfect candidate" for a lucrative outside sales position with a "leading" advertising organization in Ft. Collins, CO.

But the fact that you're contacting me for this type of position Mr. Job Recruiter tells me that you didn't bother to read anything on my resume profile.  You know the part that says I'm not really interested in a sales position, that I'm in the process of applying to writing programs in a different area of the country, that I'm actually seeking a career change and these are the current skills that I have that would be useful in that industry.  The problem I have with these people is that I feel like I have to at least oblige them a little.  You know, play along, check the opportunity out, see where it might go.  They are, after all, just doing their job while trying to make a name for themselves.  I can understand that.  Any type of sales job is competitive, demanding, and all about "look at me in my 15 minutes of fame."

I've had this e-mail sitting in one my accounts for a few days and a voicemail message on my cell phone for about 24 hours.  I've been wrestling with the thought of actually pursuing this opportunity.  I mean, what if my sketched out plans don't work out?  This would be slightly better money for the first year, probably six figures by the second or third year, it would get me out of my current situation faster, and it's a way to break into the advertising industry.  Problem is I had to turn my dollar sign blinders off for a moment (the ones that are still lingering from my twenty something self).  I had to really ask myself, without that lucrative salary, is this something you want to do?  What do you really want?

Our lives manifest from our thoughts, our choices, and then our actions.  Just because you go down one path that looks appealing doesn't mean that you stop wishing for what you originally wanted.  I know.  I made that mistake at 19, in some ways when I was 23, and again when I was 28.  Last night I decided I wasn't going to entertain the thought of possibly making it again.  Last night I decided I wasn't going to feel guilty or obligated.  I chose to say "no" so that I can continue to open up the possibility of saying "yes" to what I think I should be doing.

All day I felt free.  Happy.  Not the slightest bit of regret or second guessing.  Today I witnessed several of the Universe's "random coincidences" that confirmed I did what I was supposed to do.

The twenty-eight year old would've made a pros and cons list and then chosen what made the most logical, sound financial sense.  The thirty-four year old, on the other hand, just simply followed her heart. 


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